Then try the tension test again.

Massage provides both profound relaxation and drugless relief from stress, even pain. Afterward, a delightful physical high will last for hours, even days.

And when your partner remembers that great feeling, you will come to mind.

Put on your partner’s favorite music. If you must speak, your tone is more important than what is actually said.

During the massage itself, everything your partner experiences is simply felt.

DO

Be sure your partner’s head and torso are supported
Include the whole upper back
Be sure your partner’s eyes are closed
Warm your hands first

DON’T

Massage while your partner does something else
“Dig in” under the vertebrae and bony shoulder area
Put pressure directly on the spine
Massage under a bright overhead light

I’ll add more massage tips here soon.

Last night I saw a finely-crafted new documentary of Weston’s life and work, narrated in part by his lover, Charis Wilson. Modern photographers who work with nudes will always be indebted to Weston. His courageous photographs, shot during a much more conservative era–and with primitive equipment–still take your breath away. Charis, his muse, model, assistant and partner for many years, now in her tenth decade, quite obviously still loves him. As do we all…

People are becoming desperate for a way to relax and get some sleep. We know that pills extract a price hours or even days later. Why not give your partner a massage instead of a pill? There are no side effects to massage and it works to relax the whole body. You will see results in minutes and the longer you continue, the more relaxed your partner will become.

That’s one of the things human hands can do: ease tension.

After many iterations, Rama came up with a design that brings the reader right into the massage experience. Indeed, many of the pages have an almost filmic quality; you can almost feel the strokes move from one part of the body to another.

Here is Rama Wong’s Linkedin profile:

We live in a sensually frigid society, where virtually all touching between adults has been forced into two rigid categories: sexual or commercial. Outside of purely sexual touching, everyone goes out of their way to remain as impersonal as possible. This is from the introduction to my book THE ART OF SENSUAL MASSAGE:

“Since nearly all physical contact is construed as potentially sexual, people constantly avoid touching each other. Those licensed to touch, like Doctors, Barbers and Hairdressers and Tailors, are careful to remain as impersonal as possible lest they be accused of making an advance. The simple fact remains, however, that you can use your hands to bring immense pleasure to another human being without the coldness of traditional therapy and outside the intimacies of sex—I call it the sensual.”

I wrote that back in 1972. I had hoped we had made some progress since then in permitting our citizens to touch each other. I do hope this poor woman can be left alone and restored to her job. Teaching is stressful enough. If the kids can’t be permitted to massage a teacher’s neck and shoulders, maybe the parents can.